The world today … NO! it’s really not funny!

We received about 2 inches of snow yesterday and at

8:00 a.m. – I made a snowman.

8:10 – A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snow woman.

8:15 – So, I made a snow woman.

8:17 – My feminist neighbour complained about the snow woman’s voluptuous chest saying it objectified women everywhere.

8:20 – The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snowmen instead.

8:22 – The transgender man…woman…person asked why I didn’t just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25 – The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food.

8:28 – I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:30 – I used food colouring to make one a different colour and be more racially inclusive.

8:37 – Then I was accused of using a black face on the snowperson.

8:39 – The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be completely covered.

8:40 – The police arrived saying someone had been offended.

8:42 – The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43 – The ‘council on equality’ officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

8:45 – TV news crew from CBC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied  “snowballs” and am now a sexist.

9:00 – I was on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, and sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10 – I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.

9:29 – Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding that I be arrested.

9:45 – The boss called and fired me because of the negative association with work that had been all over social media.

10:00 – I cry into my drink because all I wanted to do was build a snowman.

Is this what this world has become?

 

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